Driving

Up along 91 in Vermont there is a hypnotic roll of green and sky. Listening to The Return of the Native, I lose my own time place as Alan Rickman spins the tale of the reddleman and his love. I find that I am way past my exit. The struggling of my car engine reminded me that this is no time for a roundabout and I turn around. I turn around. I turn and turn and there, again, my path lies before me. It is the only constant.

My journey to Goddard and my return to Goddard is not the straight and practical thing others want it to be, but I am content that it is my path. This place of learning was first brought to my attention by Leland and it has been in my path ever since.

I sneak in to the dining hall and sit way off. I resolve to enter this journey in silence, allow what comes to come and accept the gifts that are presented.

My first visitor is Sue and Eileen. I have been listening to my Spanish tapes and I hope that there will some opportunities to test my conversational skills, which are my weakest. Always there is this convergence at Goddard. I can't quite make it out, but I have long since stopped questioning what comes my way. I blurt out a bunch of stuff, spattering mental mud, and Sue is quick to see that I am waivering in my intent to enter the classroom. I feel like I have already flunked the practical application of the call to teach. It would be more accurate to say that I have been dragged to teach. She is someone who instills gentle confidence and trust. She is steady in her mind and offers a possibility. The Counseling program. It makes sense. It will serve my work with the Mandalas and Identity studies. I can still get my Spanish language skills into order.It won't conflict from the PGCC residency program.. and it is before me twice now. The guidance program would deepen and guide my teaching practice. It would also help me ground the work with physically and emotionally displaced students..... It may put some teeth in my work and weed out the airy fairy stuff.

It is something to think about and live with..... I woke up last night and thought this can not be ignored. I thought about how interesting the mandala work was. I had great responses from the non art students. I wondered how much more important this work could be if I had a better foundation, less intuition.